Mayonnaise

1 egg yolk from a happy, organic chickie

1 tsp Dijon mustard

Squeeze of lemon juice or dash of white wine vinegar

Salt & Pepper

Half a garlic clove, finely grated

Peanut Oil

The only trick to mayo is to add the oil SLOWLY at first.  If you add it too quickly it won’t emulsify and you’ll need to start again (what a drag!)  Once you've cracked it you’ll never buy mayo again (unless you’re feeding a pregnant friend or someone with a weird, raw egg allergy)

Whisk together the egg yolk, Dijon, lemon or vinegar, garlic and a little bit of salt and pepper.  Be careful with the salt as mustard can be quite salty.  Now VERY SLOWLY dribble in a bit of the oil, whisky whisky until the oil is incorporated.  Keep doing this for a while until the mixture starts to hold together and look like mayo. Now if it stays all loose and runny, you've added your oil to fast, so don't complain to me if you've been impatient; this is a labour of love, my friends.

You can then add the oil more quickly, but to be honest, I’m fairly careful as I go, it’s not like it takes a long time.  When it’s quite thick, have a taste; if it’s too eggy add a bit more oil.  If you want it a bit whiter, add a tiny bit of boiling water and whisk again, this should whiten it up (I never bother).  Taste for seasoning and lemmonyness; when you’re happy with it, liberally spread on everything.

Summery Spaghetti Bolognaise

Olive oil

1 large onion

1 stalk celery

1 carrot (preferably pulled fresh from your vegie patch)

1 bunch basil

Fresh bay leaves

2 cloves garlic

2 – 3 anchovy fillets

500g pork mince (pasture raised of course)

¼ bottle old, undrunk red wine

2 cans of tomatoes or your latest crop from the garden whizzed up in a food processor

A big squirt of pizza sauce (or tomato paste if you have it)

1 ½ diced capsicum (any colour)

Mushrooms might be nice

A splash of balsamic vinegar

1 beef stock cube

Salt & pepper

Grated Cheddar (stay with me)

Parmesan

Heat the oil over a medium heat in a very large frypan.  Very finely dice the onion, celery, carrot and basil stalks.  Slice the garlic.  Put the diced vegies, herb stalks, bay leaves and anchovies in the saucepan and cook gently, without colouring for about 15 minutes until the anchovies have disappeared and the vegies are very soft.  Once they are soft, push to one side, turn up the heat and brown the pork and break up any lumps.  Once the pork is cooked, mix through the vegies and pour over the wine.

Simmer the wine down to next to nothing and add the stock cube.  Pour over your whizzed tomatoes and squirt in your pizza base (or tomato paste).  Give it a nice mixy-mixy then add the capsicum, torn basil leaves and slosh in some balsamic vinegar.  Add a large pinch of salt and then taste for seasoning.  Grind in your pepper and then let it simmer gently until it becomes rich and unctuous.

When you’re about 15 minutes off awesomeness cook up some spaghetti in a large saucepan of salted water (yes, you do need lots of salt, or your pasta will be BLAND).

A trick I learned from Himself (I know, right‽) is to sprinkle some freshly grated cheddar in the bottom of your bowl, add your hot pasta, then the sauce on top.  Grate some parmesan and more pepper over the top and enjoy!  Finding the gooey cheddar down the bottom is always a highlight when eating the dish.